THE Greatest Gift in all my life is loving YOU.

21st December 2011, 9.29pm. I'm on the train heading towards Jurong East. I want to hear from God so badly. Specifically through people. And God knows this best. I love it when people come up to me and encourage me with words from God. I felt as if angels from God touched my heart and led me to tears of joy, leading me to realize time and time again that God is the only one I need. As I looked back, flashes of pictures appeared in my mind today. God did spoke to me. He said remain in me. The world dislikes Jesus, therefore I will face similar people who dislike His word (John 17). Listen to those who are in need, live to serve and not to be served. Be grounded in His word. Love your Daddy as yourself, one fearfully and wonderfully made.

9.41pm, I travelled towards Chua Chu Kang, I see faces of many who do not know the gift of God. All seeking the worldly pleasures - to please themselves or others. A lady reading the newspapers looking exhausted from a day's work; and faces of uncertainties. Walking down the stairs to the LRT, I see others wearing to impress. I thank God for reminding me that "For them I sanctify myself, that they too may be truely sanctified." - John 17:19

How can I sanctify myself? That was the burden I had. Being a person of low self esteem, somewhat near the other end of the scale of loving myself, God has set apart my life. He has fearfully (carefully, respectfully, reverantly) and wonderfully made me. I too have to love the people around me whom God created. I remembered my Daddy whom I find it hard to love; and this girl who likes to poke fun at my short comings. I remembered to show them acts of love - all the more doing them acts of service. It was such a timely message, tying in together the previous two training lessons. God is WOW!

BUT tracing back to the question on how to sanctify myself and to love these people who are hard to love, I now have to first make right my relationship with God. LOGOS HOPE is one of the place I could get my devotional materials from. Amazing. Where else should I start searching from? God led me to browse through the books and provided Jacqueline to do some referral. Should I get Christian books for Christmas gifts? What can be better than these? WOAO! Crazy! When did I ever start to think about all these during a season like this? Shouldn't it be all fun and a time of enjoyment?

10.08pm. I'm reaching home soon and I'm thinking about the personal letter that Hwee Chin wrote to me. I thank God once again for sending her to tell me of my shortcomings and had me pondering/ evaluating and smiling because I know God is telling me "Don't be late! God has a better plan for you dear Chelsea."

On my birthday, God loves me the same yesterday, today and forever. He never changes! God is ever present! Thank God for He is Emmanuel. He never short changes me. He is my everything, He is my all - both great and small.

God thought me so many things these past 5 days.. I'm home safely with a compelling vision to spend time in solitude with God and meditating on God's word on the MRT; pray after devotion; and apply God's word. I'm going to get a devotional material for sister and me! :)

Mummy comes out from her room, walks into the kitchen and then towards me to give me something. Yes! It wasn't a cake! It was a mango pudding for me! Amazing Father God who knows my thoughts and heard my soft request even before I thought of it.

Yes! My greatest birthday gift ever is hearing from God Himself.

WHY???

Save me!!! Dear God, save me from this tortourous world... I do not know what I'm studying and I need help. What is my purpose in this course? Why do I not meet datelines? WHY WHY WHY??? I can't do it on my own you know... T~T